Why is “Settling” Such a Charged Word?
“Settling” often comes with a negative connotation. When I googled it, one of the definitions I found was to “accept or agree to (something that one considers to be less than satisfactory)”. We assume that by settling, we’re taking a partner who’s “less than satisfactory”, but where does this notion come from in a romantic sense?
A Quick Guide to Consensual Non-Monogamy’s Many Different Relationship Structures
Marriage, and monogamous relationships, may have been the American societal norm for decades, but that tide seems to be shifting. In a national survey conducted by data analytics firm YouGov in 2020, only 56 percent of people cited complete monogamy as their ideal relationship style. An estimated 23 percent of respondents said their relationships were already non-monogamous, echoing 2017 research published in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, which found that more than one in five single Americans in their study had tried consensual non-monogamy. As Esther Perel points out in her book, The State of Affairs, “monogamy used to mean one person for life. Now, monogamy means one person at a time.”